I have begun to take a deep dive into the realm of weight loss coaching. This is not something I ever imagined myself doing. After doing Whole30 and leading others through it, incorporating all that I have learned about thought work, I realized that some of the most profound personal growth happened during the discomfort of changing my diet. One of the things I have learned is that you have to own what you want.
Today while pondering that thought in regards to physical goals for myself I could see how this applies to every area of life. I recently had a conversation with a woman that met her physical goals and felt absolutely amazing about her body but felt that she should hide it. Her past told her that to not keep it covered meant she was seeking outside validation. I encouraged her to show it off! Put on some shorts and inspire others to find the level of physical fitness that she has. I know that may be a little shocking. Here is the deal.... her wearing shorts is not the problem. Her thoughts are. What if instead of covering up she does the work? When she feels triggered by showing off her gorgeous legs she looks at the thoughts that are creating that feeling. Put on the shorts even if you're not proud of your legs, doing the thought work behind why you think they aren't beautiful. That's just a thought too! We run from the invitation to go deeper by taking an easy escape. Maybe it's putting on pants when you really want to wear shorts, maybe it's quitting the diet when it gets uncomfortable and having a hundred reasons why.
A few weeks ago I bought this outfit. It's ridiculous. If I bend over, um nope, no bending over. The top is super revealing in person. It looks like something a 16-year-old with lenient parents would wear. I knew that when I bought it but bought it anyway. One night my husband and I were getting dressed to go to dinner and I put it on. We both burst into laughter. There is no way I would wear this out. It's not even my style. Today I am working from home all day but something in me wanted to get dressed. I looked at my "why?"....why do I want to get dressed up today? Why do I want to wear this outfit? Because I feel better in my skin than I have in my entire life. Because getting dressed is fun and makes my outsides feel like my insides. Doing this energized me! There is NOTHING wrong with that. I am owning that I want to look and feel hot and young. I am choosing to do it shamelessly. I took pictures of myself to send to my husband. Not because I need him to validate me but because it's so much fun.
When I finished Whole30 I was at my goal weight. That goal was relatively easy. My coach encouraged me to set a new goal. I knew it was going to be hard when I set it. I haven't been there since my 20's but you know what? I want it. I am going to own that I want that and do so shamelessly. The reason I want it is because I want to prove to myself that I can, I want to prove that I can do things that seem impossible. I also want to do it so that next summer when I put on a swimsuit I look amazing. Who decided that vain goals are not valid? The vain goal forces me to do deep work. That's where the gold is. In the deep spaces. I am on my way to becoming the very best version of myself. That is something that I will no longer pretend I don't want. Other people may not like that version of me but I will and that is what matters most!
What do you want? Can you own that?